Monday Madness

Blurry Photo: Workers are putting up a Mor(m)on Billboard. No offense meant to members of the LDS. There's a pretty strong following here in KC.

Anyhow, This morning was a bit crazy. I ran across Karen at about 75th. Near Johnson Drive and Merriam Lane, some f'in old hag in a big old boat of a station wagon damn near took the both of us out. We had a green light and were going through the intersection. She turned directly into our path. Had I not hit the brakes, I would have broadsided her. I rolled up along side her, kind of shaking my fist. Her geriatric ass was putzing along at about 8 miles per hour, hunched over her steering wheel with her seat scooted all the way forward. A little yippy Pomeranian adorned the passenger seat, looking at me, then looking at her pet human as if to say "What the ****, Eunice, you just about creamed those bicyclists!"

I backed off and Karen followed suit. Eventually this lady's ginormous heap of crap exceeded 20 MPH at which point I could finally settle into a comfortable pace again without riding next to -- or in front of -- this wretched old hag, who would likely turn me into a speed bump. I swear, people over 60 should have a mandatory eye check, book test, and driving/parking test every year. My grandmother is 93 and does just fine. I've ridden with her and I'm totally comfortable. It's not how old people are. These people definitely need to be weeded off the road on a case-by-case basis. I couldn't reach my phone, but I thought about stopping and calling the cops. It was too late, though. I was working a brisk pace and stopping would have allowed the morning cold to soak into my bones.

As I slogged up Main some 20 minutes later, I saw the guys putting the billboard up. I stopped for a swig of water and to snag a picture. A few blocks north of there, I stopped for coffee. JR was already there, quaffing a steaming green tea concoction. No sooner could I get my order placed, and Bob was there somewhat clumsily dismounting his Schwinn SuperSport, followed moments later by Lorin on his own Schwinn. They basically ride matching Schwinns, with the exception of Lorin's being a few years older and having nearly a decimeter more frame height. As I sat down with my own Mocha, along came helmetless headphone lady and the guy on the black Diamondback Outlook. No kidding, there were six bicycles practically piled in front of the SE corner of City Center Square.

Despite temperatures in the low 40s, there were bicycle commuters out in droves today. I saw a few more pedaling around town on my way to drop some mail off at the local R2D2 Mailbox. Then, it was off to work.

Random Tunage:
Butthole Surfers - Pepper
Say Anything - Baby Girl, I'm a Blur